It's been a long day. I am sitting here, stuffed from shoving a cold cheeseburger in my mouth and slurping down some half-melted vanilla ice cream (which was still delicious :-D). I am quietly watching Chandler with his breathing tube, laying silently, and so peacefully.
This morning, I woke up to little Chandler cries around 4:30 when the nurse was checking on him. He wet the bed so it was a whole sha-bang to change the sheets, but I did get some good Chandler snuggles out of it!! I had a hard time falling back asleep so I just rested my eyes and decided to listen to a meditation. I picked a short 5 minute Peloton meditation about courage, and it really helped ground me before the day started. The host had a great message about inhaling courage and exhaling anxiety, and it also made me reflect on a podcast I was listening to before I went to bed. It was a grounding guided meditation, but the host had a message before the meditation about not getting upset about things out of our control and how anxiety does not change the outcome so it's not worth it. It was so appropriate for the day, and I seriously think it really helped me. Because looking back, I am shocked at well I handled everything - totally unexpected. I knew the doctors were coming around 6:30 to pick up Chandler so I made sure to be ready when they arrived. I washed my face, did all the morning things, and was ready to rock the day! To prepare for this transplant, I used an affirmation for the past few days, which is now one of my favorites - "I show up with courage and confidence." I mean - how bad ass is that?? So simple, yet so powerful, it applies to so much in life and I wish I would have heard it earlier. Luckily, Chandler was still asleep when we rolled him out of his room. He woke up as we were going down the hall, but he was still pretty chill. Much to our surprise, we get to the prep room and DADDY IS THERE!!! We got to see Chuck!! Boom. Tears. I was not expecting to see him in the morning, and I am so glad we did. We were all in such great spirits, with tears in our eyes (because its still scary as F.) but we were really excited to be able to do this. I think we were freaking out Chandler because we were smothering him with "We love you! you're so tough! you're going to do great!" so we backed off and gave him some space to watch PJ Masks. I signed release forms, yaddah yaddah, and Chuck's surgeon walked in. He was so nice! Dr. Juan Francisco Guerra. He was so tickled by Chuck's Liver Buddy bear that he took a pic of the two of them to share with is wife. Chuck and I share hugs and kisses and off he goes.The last thing I said to him was "Good luck having your liver baby!" Then, it was Chandler and I for about 5 minutes. They gave him some medicine to help him relax and the tears disappear and here come the giggles!!! He thought everything was just sooooo funny. I was so happy to be able to leave him on that high note. I went up the elevator and met Donna (Chuck's mom). I got a text from her before we met up that said "Pretend you don't know Bud (Chuck's dad) when you see him!" With COVID, the hospital is very strict with visitors, however they were able to sneak him in! Funny story - When Donna came with Chuck in the morning, they asked "Are you the mother".... she said "Yes"... so she got to walk down to the prep room. When another doctor saw her, they said "You're not the mother! You have to go".... her response "I am the mother! HIS mother!" hahaha. She wasn't wrong! Unfortunately, my parents weren't allowed in the hospital at all. We were originally told we could have a certain number of visitors, but we guess the rules had changed since then. Since they couldn't go in, they found a Starbucks right next door in the student area so they weren't far away so we were able to meet up with them to relax during the surgery and just waited for phone call updates. We even got a special surprise visit from Mr. Dan Sekowski, a good family friend! So, that was nice. Time passes and we head back to the waiting room and finally get an update from Chuck's surgeon! Everything went really well, the liver fit perfectly, no complications, and smooth procedure. We waited a bit longer and then Chandler's surgeon, Dr. Thomas Fishbein, popped up to tell us how everything went. Smooth! YES! The only thing that happened was a little blood clot in his liver artery which they had to go back and clear. YAY! The TRANSPLANT WAS COMPLETE and my boys were okay! We went back to the Starbucks to give the good news to my parents, we all hugged and had a happy moment. Long story short, we tried to figure out who/how both Donna and I could see Chuck but Chandler and Chuck both got to their rooms at about the same time so we split up. Donna went to see Chuck, and I went to see Chandman. In my head, I imagined some serious tears, ugly wet boogers sliding down my face, and mumbling but it wasn't like that at all. I was so happy to see him and remained super calm! I had such a strange feeling of Peace when I saw him.... like I just knew everything was okay and he is good. (I am sitting here right now, still feeling really good.) When I got to the room, lots of doctors were checking on him, they were getting him all hooked up to the machines, taking X-rays and sonograms, and it was a little crazy. I am glad we chatted a few weeks prior with another family whose son got a liver transplant about 3 years ago. They warned me about all of the IVs, tubes, and scary things you see your child go through after transplant so I was very mentally prepared. I got the low down front he anesthesiologist on how everything went, what they're doing for him, and how the rest of the night will look. The only concern they had was that Chandler tested positive for a few viruses from a cold he had (we had no idea he had a cold) since it can cause mucus in his chest. His blood is also a little thicker than most children with liver disease so the put him on a special blood thinning medication as well. Other than that, everything was settling nicely, so I was able to go sneak up and see Chuck!! Donna had just left so I played ignorant in regards to the visitor code and broke the rules... ahhh... lol. He was laying peacefully in a dark room with his eye mask on. I didn't want to wake him so I wrote a cute note on his dry erase board... but then I thought, let me just check. So I tapped his shoulder and he was awake! We hung out for about an hour, chatting about the experience, giving him updates from the day, and feeding him cranberry juice and jello. He was feeling good, but a little groggy and in some pain. Hopefully he feels better tomorrow! We cant wait for him to be able to visit Chandler, they said he can come down as soon as he feels up to it. It will be a long night since his body is adjusting to his new liver and there are little moments of pain, but I just so happy that it's finally over with! My mom gave me a reallllly sweet tea towel that I opened up in my room when everything settled down. It has the most perfect saying on it. "Life is amazing. And then it's awful. And then it's amazing again. And in between the amazing & awful, it's ordinary & mundane & routine. Breathe in the amazing. Hold on through the awful. And relax and exhale during the ordinary. That's just living heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life. And it's breathtakingly beautiful." Thank you to everyone who has reached out today asking about my boys! We can't say it enough, everyone means so much to us <3 ... And now I am off to put on my PJs ("into the night to save the day!" - sorry, I had to), eat some chocolate, put on some crappy Netflix and pass out.... until I have to wake up again at 12am for them to take another X-Ray of Chandler :)
6 Comments
Sandy Prince-Meyers
12/8/2021 05:13:33 am
So happy for all of you. Praying for a quick healing for Chuck & Chandler. I truly know the fear and anxiety associated with liver transplants. My husband had a transplant at George Washington University in DC. Leah we only live a few blocks from your old residence in Fed Hill, the traveling was horrible but well worth it. On April 19,2021 we got the call that my husband had a liver. We had some bumps in the road we are now 8 months out from transplant and my husband is doing great. I cannot express enough how vital donors are. Best wishes and positive thought for all of you.
Reply
Leah Smith
12/8/2021 09:34:45 am
Thank you!! It is always nice to hear other transplant stories, it helps us know we aren't alone. Glad to hear your husband is doing so well!
Reply
Ashley spencer
12/8/2021 05:17:52 am
Love you all! Thank you for this beautiful update Leah and allowing us on this journey with you. You guys are all so strong and amazing and we love you!!
Reply
Leah Smith
12/8/2021 09:36:26 am
Thanks Ash! <3 Love you guys too! When we were driving to the hospital, Chandler was saying he wanted to see Austin's house... haha I have no idea why that randomly popped in his head. He misses his buddies,
Reply
Greg Millenburg
12/8/2021 06:01:58 pm
Awesome stuff Leah! Chuck’s message brought tears to my eyes. Praying for a speedy and healthy recovery.
Reply
Leah Smith
12/8/2021 06:24:18 pm
Thank you! <3
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorFrom the eyes of the mom, me, Leah! The first hand experience watching my husband save our son's life by donating 17.1% of his liver. Casually releasing the stress of the day, here. ArchivesCategories |